we are afraid of what we create

I wish every 11:11 and shooting star, stray eyelash and star on tootsie pop wrapper, for you. I hope you pray for me. I do not feel hope though. It's a strange sense of.. craving? desire? A feeling I cannot describe. A sense of hope in which I do not want to be disappointed in. I want to hope without the consequences of failing-- but don't we all? Nobody wants to fail, or feel disappointment. We guard our hearts and are afraid to hope. We are afraid to feel happiness and ambition and optimism because we all know the higher we hope, the harder we will hit the ground. It's sad. We don't want to feel good. We don't want to because of fear of what comes after. We are afraid of what we create.

I hope you all have a merry Christmas. Let it snow.

love, savannah