I forgave you

{Sorry internet on my computer is really messed up and won't let me post on blogger so that's why I haven't posted recently}

The funny thing is you said "One last one." Little did you know that that really would be the last time. I remember thinking in my head and asking myself,  what if this really is the last one? The world changes so quickly when it wants to.

I'm so tired all the time now. I don't have the energy to get up in the morning. The only reason I do is because I know that if I fail school than I'll be twice as unhappy, and I don't know how that would be bearable. I just miss you.

Everyone is so upset at you and is pissed off at what you did to me. They call you a dick and a douche. But I want you to know that I'm not mad. I'm not upset, nor do I think of you as a bad person. I forgave you long ago, when this all went downhill. I just really miss you and I wonder why you left. I don't know why I try so hard and I'm never the one. I am never enough, though she is. I need to talk to you to know why. I don't know why. That's all I want to know. I just need it explained why I'm so easy to leave. Why you didn't think this would hurt me. Why? You kissed me like you meant it and then left like I was nothing.

I feel like I can get over you but I know if you said that you liked me still, I'd coming racing back.

I just need to know why.

Love, savannah